no sedatives

life would not be alive
if I’d believe
in some afterlife,
a soul,
a reincarnation
or heaven

don’t need society
to keep me locked
inside that dream
not my own

death and fear combined
the ultimate motivator
to look for what is
right here, right now

need the Fear:
the fear of death
to look for ‘no fear’
to become fearless

no time to waste


Picture by bvdb (whoisbert) september 2014 – @botanical gardens Leuven(B) – Canon Ixus HS230 – IMG_8351

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13 thoughts on “no sedatives

    • mental mind / self is very tricky — it will play all those tricks, mainly on itself to keep a steady state of no change. It wants to be in control. (we are also adrenaline chasers, and then we go to a controlled experience of fear in an ‘incredible hulk coaster’.)
      Fear has some survival functions, like fear for trains, crocs or heights.
      But the fear of death I’m talking about is different, since it affects life all the time, in its worst, as you describe it “never give something a go because of fear”. Fear of death becomes a fear of life, and it spins a web around it. Mental mind wants to be in control all the time. Unfortunately, the web doesn’t work, it just deludes us.
      I’m not an expert. I just try to see what my own mental mind is doing, and I can roughly extrapolate the grand scheme of this, but details differ for everyone.

      • thank you bert. It took me a several readings over a couple of days to understand what you meant and I think it still evades me, or rather this constant awareness doesn’t seem to stay with me. I will try though. πŸ™‚

        • I think that I have mentioned too many (about 10 items) things in one go .. and each of those could use an entire chapter to be explained. Let me try and give you a structured answer within a couple of .. as time permits (days).

        • OK, I took some more time trying to explain … sorry for having postponed this reply …

          In our mental mind, we are aware of a ‘self’. It has a history, that looks like a CV, it has memories and experience. This part of self is in the past.
          ‘Self’ has desires for a near and far future. Like wanting a car or an apartment. This part of self is in the future.

          If we question what this ‘self’ really is , … it seems to be a construction of our own mental mind about itself, based on some mental processes: memory, experiences, … never based on the present.

          But there are parts of us that are in the present, always, and they are most often not that ‘self’. They are not part of it.

          When we identify with the constructed ‘self’ living in past and future, but never in the now, we will fear that we are going to end, one day, one way or the other.

          Society encourages our identification with self, in all kinds of identity verifications and confirmations, with written tags, drivers license, passport, credit cards etc, and also with collective solutions of fear of death, like a constructed belief in an afterlife. (regardless of its existence)

          On the other hand, any end of life near and far, that is noticed by our ‘self’ identity is seen as a great danger to itself, and the ‘self’ will construct walls of defense against ‘the end of self’, even the idea abou it; but deep inside, ‘self’ is full of fear. This fear of death becomes a fear of life: all conscious and unconscious defences that are constructed, become an obstruction to life itself, and living now …

    • Well, I’m trying to ‘find’ the no-self … but it isn’t easy. There is a lot of fire inside my heart these past 4 weeks … love the energy, then tomorrow there will be lack of sleep

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