january 2013: When I’m reasoning (writing an essay), talking to myself (always to be right), or zapping through my mind (random thoughts jumping up), I identify with mind.
february 2013: What strange awareness will it be not to identify with the mind. Will there be a new identity, or will there be no identity? Will my identification shift from mind to something else? Or will identification stop? Or will I awaken to spiritual psychosis as described by Stanislav Grof in Spiritual emergency? Am I not too rational for that?
march 2013: When the train of thought takes a ride, identification wants to be there. But happiness seems to be able to exist without having to identify, … and so does sadness. Anger cannot. Anger needs reason, strange that is. Perhaps Yoda was right: “Fear leads to anger, anger leads to hate, hate leads to suffering“
But the happiness and laughter do not start when I identify with silence, it starts when i do not identify at all. It is an incessant tap of happiness. So close to me. Stop the identification and there you are. But be ware: “this too will pass”
I notice that I’m tired with meditation, I yawn and think of food. I notice this, and get up to eat.