We can always peek through the veil of mysticism, because yes, we are not different from the mystic. We only have to forget who we think we are and listen. This is easier said than done.
But moments of awe are moments of mysticism:
when a deer crosses our path early in the morning,
when we watch the sunrise and see the sky turn purple, pink and orange and finally see the sun,
when we feel the snow falling on our nose,
or when we witness an unexpected act of kindness …
When I feel bad I don’t see ‘awe’ at all, not immediately, I have to make a conscious effort and tear down part of the wall that ‘feeling bad’ has built around me.
Today my subconscious expects a reprimand for telling the truth to a client and declining a 5 day job. I explained to him why I am not the best person to do this work, and that it would cost more time and money since I don’t have the necessary experience.
Of course this reprimand will never come, but I don’t have much influence on my subconscious. It took nearly half a century to program it the way it is, it might take the same amount of time to un-program it.
Truth is easy to remember, and although it sometimes hurts, it gives more time to those at the receiving side. But my subconscious does not agree. I suppose it remembers telling the truth to my parents about pranks I played at school when I was a child, and being punished for it a second time.
I noticed today that it is very difficult see ‘awe’ when under the spell of fear. The animal goes inside its cage for protection and anyone coming too close meets the angry reaction of ‘leave me alone’. This is not difficult today, since I’m all alone in my office.
But awe can get me out of my cage: awe is a kind of primordial love. When I feel awe, I am speechless and without fear. Awe today came just after sunset …